In the Buddha hall of Shaolin temple, there are indentations found in the stone floor. Legend has it these were made by generations of monks training and putting down their feet with great intention during training.
If you just start out training (which to me means at least the first 5-10 years) and you are ambitious by you might be tempted to try and be and do as your sempai (seniors). Although this ambition may be admirable it is also futile.
Just as you cannot make new indentations in a flat stone floor in your lifetime, you cannot be what you are not. Or should I say what you aren’t yet.
Budo is a long term endeavor. And trying to speed up the process is ignorant. It’s trying to get somewhere you can never get to, only faster.
Setting short term goals and working towards them is only kidding yourself temporarily time after time. “When I get this 5th kyu I’ll be closer to where I want to get.” After you pass the grade: “Now I’ll work to win this competition.” After that another exam of maybe a demonstration.
But these short term goals are only blind-sighting yourself to what you are doing and where you are going. Where are you going, what do you want?
As I see it, in the end all we do in training is “mukudoku”, meaning “without merit”. There is no reward. Nothing that we really want or are really looking for can be attained.
So if all your effort (goal oriented or not) is futile, what’s the point of training? Daido roshi (a Zen master) said the following:
In order to live in accord with the fundamental nature of things, all intentional efforts must first vanish. The essential path abides in non-action, yet nothing is left undone.
Of course: there is accumulation of skill, there is growth of knowledge, there is improvement, there is a path to mastery. But you cannot seek it, nor can you manage it. You don’t know where you are on the path or were you need to go. Nor does anyone else.
All we can do is train and study. While engaged in training there is nothing wrong with doing your exams, competitions or demonstrations.
But do not try to be somewhere you have not yet arrived. Enjoy this path you are following, don’t postpone this happiness until you get where you think you are going.
Don’t grasp, don’t compete, don’t seek reward. Because there is none.
There is only training, hard intensive training, goalless, effortless and without reward. Please enjoy!
Disclaimer:
This article is part of a series of articles covering the personal views of Arjan Fusō. The purpose of these articles is to provide students of budō and in particular students of Kochōkai a point of view to think about, discuss and use to form their own views. These are not necessarily the views of all students and friends of Kochōkai.
